Friday, May 29, 2009
Senior Moments Has Moved
Jerry's blog, Senior Moments, has moved to the new Senior Citizen Journal site. His daily posts can be found at http://seniorcitizenjournal.com/. The new site is now complete, so be sure to check daily for helpful information directed toward Seniors and Baby Boomers everywhere!
Monday, May 25, 2009
New Senior Moments Blog address
The new address for Senior Moments Blog can be found at http://www.seniorcitizenjournal.com. Be sure to read Jerry's latest post there, and check out the rest of the site! We're still working on converting the entire site, so please ignore what we haven't yet changed! (The title and logo haven't been uploaded yet, so it will look a little strange!) It should be done in a day or two.
Friday, May 22, 2009
The After Effects of Cancer
For those who have been through the threat of cancer, there are some very disturbing after effects. If surgery were required, there are scars other than that created by the surgeon's knife. If therapies of one kind or another were required, there are recollections of lost hair and other debilitating experiences.
But more than that, and deeper, is the psychic phenomenon experienced from the dramatic and traumatic facing of the possibility of death.
Vulnerabity is a consequence of looking in the mirror and accomodating the real fact of your mortality. It may not come in that dramatic way. But it comes. It hits you when suddenly you discover your fears. You discover that you literally are no longer the person you once were. Behaviors strange to you emerge. Personality shifts such as self confidence to uncertainty become apparent. Discomfort replaces comfort in social settings. Strange dispositions affect your interactions or lack of them with others. Self confidence is shaken. What once was natural and normal is no longer. Acquaintance with new feelings challenges you. The body you once took for granted has been assaulted and insulted.
These are just some of the dynamics that accompany adjusting to life after cancer. Once a happy go lucky person, you may now be less witty, less spontaneous, more withdrawn.
Now, be quick to understand that these phenomena do not last forever. However, these and other emotional adjustments are real and normal.
Allowing yourself to accept that, will assist getting to the other side. You may never return 100% to the person you were. A major paradigm shift has occurred. Such shifts occur often, as we age, with or without a major physical assault. But, with cancer (and often strokes and heart attacks) you can depend that there may be seismic shifts in who you are and how you behave. For some, they may be more subtle. For others, they may be significantly different enough that others will notice the change.
Anixety over your own altered behavior, attitudes, mindset, etc. is neither helpful or healthy. The flow of your life will continue. Adjusting to some of the changes will be easy. Accepting others will be a challenge. Allowing yourself to forge ahead and to be who you are, not worrying over who you were, will free you to escape the prison of worry, anxiety and depression.
Some counseling, conversation with those you trust and love, readings, meditation, and other such disciplines may give you strength and forebearance. Do not ignore your condition. While I was surprised to realize the seismic shifts that had occurred with my personality, following cancer, it was an enormously helpful insight to see what others had already surmised. Beyond the discovery, there was the process of dealing with some of those changes.
Now, I can adjust and accomodate some behaviors that are blatantly obvious and dismiss others that were obnoxiously taking over.
I commend to you your own working through the dynamics of dealing with the after effects of cancer. Curing cancer is possible in some situations. Curing yourself from frightening fears and after effects is also within your capability. I commend your focusing not only on the curative process for cancer, but on the behaviors that often accompany it.
Monday's Post: The Fear of Forgetfulness
But more than that, and deeper, is the psychic phenomenon experienced from the dramatic and traumatic facing of the possibility of death.
Vulnerabity is a consequence of looking in the mirror and accomodating the real fact of your mortality. It may not come in that dramatic way. But it comes. It hits you when suddenly you discover your fears. You discover that you literally are no longer the person you once were. Behaviors strange to you emerge. Personality shifts such as self confidence to uncertainty become apparent. Discomfort replaces comfort in social settings. Strange dispositions affect your interactions or lack of them with others. Self confidence is shaken. What once was natural and normal is no longer. Acquaintance with new feelings challenges you. The body you once took for granted has been assaulted and insulted.
These are just some of the dynamics that accompany adjusting to life after cancer. Once a happy go lucky person, you may now be less witty, less spontaneous, more withdrawn.
Now, be quick to understand that these phenomena do not last forever. However, these and other emotional adjustments are real and normal.
Allowing yourself to accept that, will assist getting to the other side. You may never return 100% to the person you were. A major paradigm shift has occurred. Such shifts occur often, as we age, with or without a major physical assault. But, with cancer (and often strokes and heart attacks) you can depend that there may be seismic shifts in who you are and how you behave. For some, they may be more subtle. For others, they may be significantly different enough that others will notice the change.
Anixety over your own altered behavior, attitudes, mindset, etc. is neither helpful or healthy. The flow of your life will continue. Adjusting to some of the changes will be easy. Accepting others will be a challenge. Allowing yourself to forge ahead and to be who you are, not worrying over who you were, will free you to escape the prison of worry, anxiety and depression.
Some counseling, conversation with those you trust and love, readings, meditation, and other such disciplines may give you strength and forebearance. Do not ignore your condition. While I was surprised to realize the seismic shifts that had occurred with my personality, following cancer, it was an enormously helpful insight to see what others had already surmised. Beyond the discovery, there was the process of dealing with some of those changes.
Now, I can adjust and accomodate some behaviors that are blatantly obvious and dismiss others that were obnoxiously taking over.
I commend to you your own working through the dynamics of dealing with the after effects of cancer. Curing cancer is possible in some situations. Curing yourself from frightening fears and after effects is also within your capability. I commend your focusing not only on the curative process for cancer, but on the behaviors that often accompany it.
Monday's Post: The Fear of Forgetfulness
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Anxiety, Anger and Apathy
Three of the big time injuries often self inflicted, particularly among the aging, are anxiety, anger and apathy. To be sure there are contrasts in these states of mind, but also clearly they are loaded with such inordinately negative ammunition to be killers.
Each of these emotions work negatively on the heart, body, soul and spirit. They go further for they alienate perfectly good and well meaning friends from the stable of those who are best equipped to offer you solace when you need it.
Anxiety is probably the most critically dangerous of the three, particularly when/if it is harbored quietly and daily. Anxiety may or may not be detectable by others. Sometimes, the victim knows when it is taking over and needs to be checked. Often, little or no strategic response is introduced. Anxiety is like termites in a house. It eats at you, the inside of you, until the damage may be beyond repair.
Anger is more blatant and less subtle. It is visible and dramatic. It is fed by guilt and fear and vulnerability and anxiety. As a matter of fact, anxiety enjoys anger, for it allows the full blown expression of anxiety and anger to make themselves known to all in their way.
Anger is also troubling physically. Its influence on the health of body and spirit can be frightfully damaging. Anger is, for some, often difficult to control. Some persons suffer from something called "intermittent rage disorder" which is chemically prompted and cannot be self disciplined. Therapy and medication are both useful methods for governing this behavior.
Apathy, at last would seem almost a cure for the two previously discussed conditions. However, apathy has the reverse effect of anxiety and anger. Apathy can be a serious depression which contributes to loss of energy, interest and involvement in everything beyond yourself. Such loss steals your vitality and uniqueness. It creates a sense of non-worth. It is uncomfortable to be in such a state and to be around someone going through it. Needless to say, it affects the body and spirit of the one going through it. It is a way of putting walls up between yourself and healthy interactions, just as anxiety and anger may.
These three states of mind require passports that you create and stamp when you decide to travel across their boundaries. Use your perseverance to be on the alert when any of these behaviors begin to threaten your well being. If you drink alcohol, resist it, for most of these behaviors are exacerbated by drinking.
Decide that these three A's, fed by a fourth, alcohol, may introduce you to more rapid and unhealthy aging.
Tomorrow's Post: The After Effects of Cancer
Each of these emotions work negatively on the heart, body, soul and spirit. They go further for they alienate perfectly good and well meaning friends from the stable of those who are best equipped to offer you solace when you need it.
Anxiety is probably the most critically dangerous of the three, particularly when/if it is harbored quietly and daily. Anxiety may or may not be detectable by others. Sometimes, the victim knows when it is taking over and needs to be checked. Often, little or no strategic response is introduced. Anxiety is like termites in a house. It eats at you, the inside of you, until the damage may be beyond repair.
Anger is more blatant and less subtle. It is visible and dramatic. It is fed by guilt and fear and vulnerability and anxiety. As a matter of fact, anxiety enjoys anger, for it allows the full blown expression of anxiety and anger to make themselves known to all in their way.
Anger is also troubling physically. Its influence on the health of body and spirit can be frightfully damaging. Anger is, for some, often difficult to control. Some persons suffer from something called "intermittent rage disorder" which is chemically prompted and cannot be self disciplined. Therapy and medication are both useful methods for governing this behavior.
Apathy, at last would seem almost a cure for the two previously discussed conditions. However, apathy has the reverse effect of anxiety and anger. Apathy can be a serious depression which contributes to loss of energy, interest and involvement in everything beyond yourself. Such loss steals your vitality and uniqueness. It creates a sense of non-worth. It is uncomfortable to be in such a state and to be around someone going through it. Needless to say, it affects the body and spirit of the one going through it. It is a way of putting walls up between yourself and healthy interactions, just as anxiety and anger may.
These three states of mind require passports that you create and stamp when you decide to travel across their boundaries. Use your perseverance to be on the alert when any of these behaviors begin to threaten your well being. If you drink alcohol, resist it, for most of these behaviors are exacerbated by drinking.
Decide that these three A's, fed by a fourth, alcohol, may introduce you to more rapid and unhealthy aging.
Tomorrow's Post: The After Effects of Cancer
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Why Didn't Somebody Tell Me?
There are so many adjustments in aging that, as it happens, we seem always to be surprised with the next one. Our despair is we wonder why someone didn't warn us. Why didn't someone, anyone, give us a hint of what was ahead?
Of course, they did. Of course, we didn't listen or assumed it just didn't apply to us. The adolescent tendency to assume that rules just don't make any difference to us seems to tarry longer as we grow older.
To be fair, some do listen and with that begin to equip themselves with the armor necessary to meet aging. Some continue regimens of exercise and activity to keep the body in shape; others work on mental acuity; still others do yoga and other disciplines which seem to head off the invasion of
growing older.
Perhaps, since we are at the age we are and, it may be a bit late to listen to others and their counsel, it would be well to start listening to ourselves.
Surely our bodies are sending us signals. Certainly our minds are trying to communicate. Of course, if our hearing (internal) is shot we may be immune to input even from ourselves.
Here are some of the qustions that may be trying to get through:
*How are you coming on your attention to healthy foods?
*Are you keeping your weight in check?
*How is your blood pressure?
*When did you have your last Breast or PSA exam?
*Is it time to schedule a colonoscopy?
*When is your annual physical due?
*Have you checked for strange bumps and growths and mysterious spots?
*Incidentally, how is your hearing?
These are just a few of the haunting questions which may be trying to make connections with you. Maybe, if reading these prompts others, you need to make a plan for responding, and soon!
Of course, they did. Of course, we didn't listen or assumed it just didn't apply to us. The adolescent tendency to assume that rules just don't make any difference to us seems to tarry longer as we grow older.
To be fair, some do listen and with that begin to equip themselves with the armor necessary to meet aging. Some continue regimens of exercise and activity to keep the body in shape; others work on mental acuity; still others do yoga and other disciplines which seem to head off the invasion of
growing older.
Perhaps, since we are at the age we are and, it may be a bit late to listen to others and their counsel, it would be well to start listening to ourselves.
Surely our bodies are sending us signals. Certainly our minds are trying to communicate. Of course, if our hearing (internal) is shot we may be immune to input even from ourselves.
Here are some of the qustions that may be trying to get through:
*How are you coming on your attention to healthy foods?
*Are you keeping your weight in check?
*How is your blood pressure?
*When did you have your last Breast or PSA exam?
*Is it time to schedule a colonoscopy?
*When is your annual physical due?
*Have you checked for strange bumps and growths and mysterious spots?
*Incidentally, how is your hearing?
These are just a few of the haunting questions which may be trying to make connections with you. Maybe, if reading these prompts others, you need to make a plan for responding, and soon!
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Looking for a Piece of Heaven?
The time has come to make a major life change. After deliberate and extensive conversation, much grooming and primping, our Texas estate is on the market. It may be seen in full splendor at http://www.texas-country-estate-for-sale.com/. I invite you to take a virtual tour.
This wonderful dream haven requires more of me than I can any longer give, even with yard and pool help. Couple that with our having identified a second home, with family nearby, and you have the reasons for our selling this magnificent house of memories. It has been the palette on which we have created a masterpiece. As with all houses, it may have a few features that others would not find so much to their liking, but overall it rates superior compliments. It offers tranquility, privacy, an ecological paradise, a wild life refuge, a luxurious pool with waterfall, a place where deserved relaxation is a daily gift. With assistance, as we have had, both with the pool and grounds, it is not too much to manage.
Thus, we invite you to take a look and, if interested, make the necessary inquiries as outlined in our website. Our caretakers are busily keeping it manicured with all the summer growth and occasional rains helping as well.
Perhaps you will know someone who would find such a location intriguing for retirement, second home, a family residence with lots of play room and nearby lakes and streams and recreational options.
Choosing life's options as they are presented to us is just another part of our maturation. This is one of our steps, which we hope we are taking with adequate care and appropriate insight. It isn't easy, but life closes one door only to open another.
This wonderful dream haven requires more of me than I can any longer give, even with yard and pool help. Couple that with our having identified a second home, with family nearby, and you have the reasons for our selling this magnificent house of memories. It has been the palette on which we have created a masterpiece. As with all houses, it may have a few features that others would not find so much to their liking, but overall it rates superior compliments. It offers tranquility, privacy, an ecological paradise, a wild life refuge, a luxurious pool with waterfall, a place where deserved relaxation is a daily gift. With assistance, as we have had, both with the pool and grounds, it is not too much to manage.
Thus, we invite you to take a look and, if interested, make the necessary inquiries as outlined in our website. Our caretakers are busily keeping it manicured with all the summer growth and occasional rains helping as well.
Perhaps you will know someone who would find such a location intriguing for retirement, second home, a family residence with lots of play room and nearby lakes and streams and recreational options.
Choosing life's options as they are presented to us is just another part of our maturation. This is one of our steps, which we hope we are taking with adequate care and appropriate insight. It isn't easy, but life closes one door only to open another.
Monday, May 18, 2009
The Best Part of the Day
Just returned from walking our two "princes of the family," a daschund and a papillion, Zeb and Patton. .The cool part of the day, in Arizona, is the most desirable time for such exercise, our little daschund, less than ten pounds is the leader or the pack. He is into power walks.
Since surgery, it has been a long time coming to the discipline and decision for me to walk briskly and have the satisfaction of seeing results. They seem to have a sense that Dad needs the encouragement and they help provide the initiative and the company.
So, my wonderful spouse and I take off on a journey, led by them, enjoying our morning conversation, and the cool desert air. It really is the best part of the day.
Our endorphins are popping, our emotions on a high, our choices for the day in the process of being made. As a retiree there are many choices, the best part, however, is having the option of choosing from among them.
What I know is that our two pets don't allow ignoring choosing them. They are literally in our face until the leashes go on and the front door is opened to another beckoning adventure. For them and us, that is the best part of the day!
Since surgery, it has been a long time coming to the discipline and decision for me to walk briskly and have the satisfaction of seeing results. They seem to have a sense that Dad needs the encouragement and they help provide the initiative and the company.
So, my wonderful spouse and I take off on a journey, led by them, enjoying our morning conversation, and the cool desert air. It really is the best part of the day.
Our endorphins are popping, our emotions on a high, our choices for the day in the process of being made. As a retiree there are many choices, the best part, however, is having the option of choosing from among them.
What I know is that our two pets don't allow ignoring choosing them. They are literally in our face until the leashes go on and the front door is opened to another beckoning adventure. For them and us, that is the best part of the day!
Friday, May 15, 2009
Check on Your Vocabulary Habits
How many words have you removed from your vocabulary in the past four decades? How many insulting, racist, bigoted, ignorant, inappropriate words have you chosen to delete from your conversation, thought, and interaction with others?
How many words can you consciously bring forward right now that you would be ashamed to use in the presence of your family, your children, polite company, friends, even casual acquaintances?
If you can come up with very many, what does that say about you? If you come up with any at all, that would be shared with such an audience, what does that say about them?
I have been in the company of some who seem to have no hesitation at all to come forth with racial slurs, ethnic put downs, insulting and hurtful comments, obscene characterizations, ugly references. There seems to be no sensitivity to the feelings of others, no regard.
Why does such behavior seem to inflate the importance of the one responsible for it? Can he or she not see that it is demeaning even to him/herself?
Why do hearers give permission to such language invading the circle, drowning the otherwise pleasant decorum of a group?
Why is it that some people think they are superior by belittling others? Where does their self image gain its birth and reinforcement? Wouldn't it be just as well that their thoughts be aborted?
Review your inventory of removed words. Congratulate yourself that you no longer draw upon them. Find healthy ways to call attention to others how pleasant it is to refuse to engage in deriding and disrespectful commentary.
This is just one more way to share in making the world greener by removing the pollution of profane and hurtful language.
How many words can you consciously bring forward right now that you would be ashamed to use in the presence of your family, your children, polite company, friends, even casual acquaintances?
If you can come up with very many, what does that say about you? If you come up with any at all, that would be shared with such an audience, what does that say about them?
I have been in the company of some who seem to have no hesitation at all to come forth with racial slurs, ethnic put downs, insulting and hurtful comments, obscene characterizations, ugly references. There seems to be no sensitivity to the feelings of others, no regard.
Why does such behavior seem to inflate the importance of the one responsible for it? Can he or she not see that it is demeaning even to him/herself?
Why do hearers give permission to such language invading the circle, drowning the otherwise pleasant decorum of a group?
Why is it that some people think they are superior by belittling others? Where does their self image gain its birth and reinforcement? Wouldn't it be just as well that their thoughts be aborted?
Review your inventory of removed words. Congratulate yourself that you no longer draw upon them. Find healthy ways to call attention to others how pleasant it is to refuse to engage in deriding and disrespectful commentary.
This is just one more way to share in making the world greener by removing the pollution of profane and hurtful language.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Looking for Guest Columnists
Looking for a topic is sometimes like trying to find a quote in just one of the several hundred books in my library. It takes more than sudden inspiration. An idea doesn't automatically materialize into a well conceived series of intelligible and coherent sentences. It would be nice if it worked that way. For some, perhaps it does. Finding a meaningful way to weave several sentences into some kind of logical thought is often up to the reader more than the writer.
Sometimes I am bereft of any idea at all which suggests a topic that might offer appeal to even one reader. Sometimes I have more ideas than space or time to write them, not that they are all worthy of being committed to the printed page.
At other times, perhaps like this one, I feel in an isolated setting wondering how I can find a germ of a concept that might infect this page with words that are contagious.
So, lacking a bottomless well of ideas, I might turn to others with an invitation of writing a column for this special audience. I am happy to do that, if you will provide me with a usuable response and soon. I am happy to honor the burgeoning of ideas that come from some well other than my own. I invite you be a guest author. Send as you will and I will likely post and publish, after some possible editing, your contribution. If you see your article here, I hope you will find the thrill I find in knowing that literally people from all over the world come to read what finds its literary home here.
Tomorrow's Post: Check on Your Vocabulary Habits
Sometimes I am bereft of any idea at all which suggests a topic that might offer appeal to even one reader. Sometimes I have more ideas than space or time to write them, not that they are all worthy of being committed to the printed page.
At other times, perhaps like this one, I feel in an isolated setting wondering how I can find a germ of a concept that might infect this page with words that are contagious.
So, lacking a bottomless well of ideas, I might turn to others with an invitation of writing a column for this special audience. I am happy to do that, if you will provide me with a usuable response and soon. I am happy to honor the burgeoning of ideas that come from some well other than my own. I invite you be a guest author. Send as you will and I will likely post and publish, after some possible editing, your contribution. If you see your article here, I hope you will find the thrill I find in knowing that literally people from all over the world come to read what finds its literary home here.
Tomorrow's Post: Check on Your Vocabulary Habits
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Alzheimer's: A Documentary Worth Your Time
HBO is showing a public service documentary dealing with the intricacies and dynamics of Alzheimer's. Like most information, it is both enlightening and encouraging to find out more about this scary disease.
Along with Cancer, Alzheimer's is at the top of the list of most feared diseases. This documentary does much to quell the fear by providing insights and explanations that involve this disease. If you have not seen it, it runs all day on HBO (I find it on Channel 300). It will be well worth your time to see the complete production. It will also be useful for your children, grandchildren and others whom you know to be aware of this extremely well done and professional piece.
A segment in the series deals with grandchildren and their coping with
grandparents who have the disease.
Trust me, you will be glad you spend the time required to increase your knowledge of this dread disease and likely find encouragement in the information it offers.
Tomorrow's Post: An Invitation to Guest Columnists
Along with Cancer, Alzheimer's is at the top of the list of most feared diseases. This documentary does much to quell the fear by providing insights and explanations that involve this disease. If you have not seen it, it runs all day on HBO (I find it on Channel 300). It will be well worth your time to see the complete production. It will also be useful for your children, grandchildren and others whom you know to be aware of this extremely well done and professional piece.
A segment in the series deals with grandchildren and their coping with
grandparents who have the disease.
Trust me, you will be glad you spend the time required to increase your knowledge of this dread disease and likely find encouragement in the information it offers.
Tomorrow's Post: An Invitation to Guest Columnists
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
What Gift Do You Bring?
Of the several million now who have been overcome by the amazing talent of Susan Boyle, I find myself wondering, with daily frequency, what gifts are out there yet to be uncovered?
This column gave advice sometime ago about all the treasures and unknown valuables that are hiding in our attics and garages and basements and who knows where. Those might be easy to discover and identify.
But what about the gifts that are hidden in our hearts and voices and minds and stuffed behind our shyness and our reluctance and our lack of belief in ourselves.
Not all of us will experience the wonder of Susan's remarkable moment of discovery. That is okay. But any of us who muster the courage to try deserve the chance to do so. Not all of us will catch the golden ring, but coming to that moment when we believe in ourselves, take a risk and push the boundaries will also open a new depth of appreciation of who we are and what we can offer.
Playing an instrument, writing a poem, painting an original, designing a sculpture, opening new windows to new ideas and new stimulations never before known may give you the very treasure toward which your life has been moving.
Perhaps you have always wanted to compose the lyrics to a moving melody, or write short stories, or offer inspiration in unexpected ways. Why not? Who said you can't? Whoever stands or has stood in the way, allow them to be excused. Offer your gift. We who await you will know that your gift is special and your reward will come in ways we cannot now imagine.
This column gave advice sometime ago about all the treasures and unknown valuables that are hiding in our attics and garages and basements and who knows where. Those might be easy to discover and identify.
But what about the gifts that are hidden in our hearts and voices and minds and stuffed behind our shyness and our reluctance and our lack of belief in ourselves.
Not all of us will experience the wonder of Susan's remarkable moment of discovery. That is okay. But any of us who muster the courage to try deserve the chance to do so. Not all of us will catch the golden ring, but coming to that moment when we believe in ourselves, take a risk and push the boundaries will also open a new depth of appreciation of who we are and what we can offer.
Playing an instrument, writing a poem, painting an original, designing a sculpture, opening new windows to new ideas and new stimulations never before known may give you the very treasure toward which your life has been moving.
Perhaps you have always wanted to compose the lyrics to a moving melody, or write short stories, or offer inspiration in unexpected ways. Why not? Who said you can't? Whoever stands or has stood in the way, allow them to be excused. Offer your gift. We who await you will know that your gift is special and your reward will come in ways we cannot now imagine.
Monday, May 11, 2009
Wherever You Are, Good Health is Available
The column dealing with "New York,Therapy for Seniors" was exceptionally well received. New York is a favorite key word and therapy is something most of search for a great deal of the time.
Ironically, where you are good health, whether mental or physical, is available. Two weeks prior to New York, we were in San Francisco, what a dynamite city, what endorphins we found to keep us going!
The truth is that travel is wondrous therapy. It distracts us from the day to day anxieties which we could just as well find ways to avoid at home. We don't, so going somewhere seems to be one of the top ten ways to allow your sub conscious to take over and kick out the more troubling aspects of day to day living.
What about travel seems to contribute to good health? Even with the scares of international excursions today, swine flu and all the other dire
warnings, preparing for the trip itself is a huge contributor for dwelling on tomorrow and its adventures.
Here are some suggestions:
*At least twice a year, your own resources allowing, plan a trip to some desirable destination. It may be for a brief holiday or up to a week or more. While you will want to see significant places and dine in well known gourmet restaurants, allow time for serendipity. Do something off the cuff. Don't plan every minute.
*Scale down on packing. Do not be a slave to your baggage. Be a minimalist for a change. Try to check only one bag and a couple of carry ons.
*Try to reserve a seat or a pair which will give you the most comfort and least hassle on the trip.
*Research the hotel(s) or other lodging where you will be staying. Assure yourself of the maximum comfort within your price range.
*Check on transportation which will reduce your discomfort getting from airport to hotel and other destinations.
*Don't be afraid to sleep in one morning.
*Find out of the way spots for meals and cocktails. Make friends whenever you have a chance. Strike up conversations, explore the world around you. Leave your reserve and shyness at home.
*Practice allowing yourself to poke around in shops, antique stores, novelty places (not traps) just for the fun of it.
*Laugh a lot. Crane your neck. Make every minute an adventure.
Are you beginning to feel better yet? If not, then you may need to rethink your whole plan and decide on an itinerary that better satisfies you. Just do it. The adventure and the therapy will make it all worth your while.
Ironically, where you are good health, whether mental or physical, is available. Two weeks prior to New York, we were in San Francisco, what a dynamite city, what endorphins we found to keep us going!
The truth is that travel is wondrous therapy. It distracts us from the day to day anxieties which we could just as well find ways to avoid at home. We don't, so going somewhere seems to be one of the top ten ways to allow your sub conscious to take over and kick out the more troubling aspects of day to day living.
What about travel seems to contribute to good health? Even with the scares of international excursions today, swine flu and all the other dire
warnings, preparing for the trip itself is a huge contributor for dwelling on tomorrow and its adventures.
Here are some suggestions:
*At least twice a year, your own resources allowing, plan a trip to some desirable destination. It may be for a brief holiday or up to a week or more. While you will want to see significant places and dine in well known gourmet restaurants, allow time for serendipity. Do something off the cuff. Don't plan every minute.
*Scale down on packing. Do not be a slave to your baggage. Be a minimalist for a change. Try to check only one bag and a couple of carry ons.
*Try to reserve a seat or a pair which will give you the most comfort and least hassle on the trip.
*Research the hotel(s) or other lodging where you will be staying. Assure yourself of the maximum comfort within your price range.
*Check on transportation which will reduce your discomfort getting from airport to hotel and other destinations.
*Don't be afraid to sleep in one morning.
*Find out of the way spots for meals and cocktails. Make friends whenever you have a chance. Strike up conversations, explore the world around you. Leave your reserve and shyness at home.
*Practice allowing yourself to poke around in shops, antique stores, novelty places (not traps) just for the fun of it.
*Laugh a lot. Crane your neck. Make every minute an adventure.
Are you beginning to feel better yet? If not, then you may need to rethink your whole plan and decide on an itinerary that better satisfies you. Just do it. The adventure and the therapy will make it all worth your while.
Friday, May 8, 2009
Day 5: Keeping Young After 70
Sometimes, because of circumstances beyond our control, it is difficult to
maintain the stamina to keep and feel young at and beyond 70. Some, whose personal disciplines have been positive, usually keep the frame in shape, the appearance relatively attractive, the heart pumping nicely and the trips to a physician few. Those are the ones we would like to emulate. They have a secret or discovered a formula early on that has worked great for them. My father in law at 93 is one of those.
While it isn't too late to start at 70, those who started and sustained from earlier on are obviously at an advantage. Now, what do the rest of us do?
These are a few possible ideas:
*Cultivate and keep a sense of humor. Don't take life and its issues so damn seriously. If the word "damn" bothers you, stop reading now.
*Cultivate and keep ways to be active, mentally, physically and productively. Some productivity, because of extenuating circumstances, just simply goes past 70. All of it doesn't have to.
*Stay in touch with the world. Decide you need to know. Choose to be in the middle of things. Allow yourself to stay ahead on some and forget about the unnecessary.
*Keep your mental attitude in good condition. This one may be tough. It requires staying away from grumps. Tell them you are out, when they call.
*Stay sentimental. That is one of the choices which makes us feel good about ourselves, others and the rest of the world. If you can cry, you still have a heart.
*Reread the Wizard of Oz...remember the lion and tin man and scarecrow
all discovered how to keep young and they are way past 70.
maintain the stamina to keep and feel young at and beyond 70. Some, whose personal disciplines have been positive, usually keep the frame in shape, the appearance relatively attractive, the heart pumping nicely and the trips to a physician few. Those are the ones we would like to emulate. They have a secret or discovered a formula early on that has worked great for them. My father in law at 93 is one of those.
While it isn't too late to start at 70, those who started and sustained from earlier on are obviously at an advantage. Now, what do the rest of us do?
These are a few possible ideas:
*Cultivate and keep a sense of humor. Don't take life and its issues so damn seriously. If the word "damn" bothers you, stop reading now.
*Cultivate and keep ways to be active, mentally, physically and productively. Some productivity, because of extenuating circumstances, just simply goes past 70. All of it doesn't have to.
*Stay in touch with the world. Decide you need to know. Choose to be in the middle of things. Allow yourself to stay ahead on some and forget about the unnecessary.
*Keep your mental attitude in good condition. This one may be tough. It requires staying away from grumps. Tell them you are out, when they call.
*Stay sentimental. That is one of the choices which makes us feel good about ourselves, others and the rest of the world. If you can cry, you still have a heart.
*Reread the Wizard of Oz...remember the lion and tin man and scarecrow
all discovered how to keep young and they are way past 70.
Thursday, May 7, 2009
Day 4: Change Works, Even at 70
The other day this column began a series on changing. In just four days results are becoming obvious. In four days, some bad habits have been surrendered. In four days, some good habits have been adopted. In four days, my body, mind, and attitude are experiencing a huge difference. How many days to go? A lifetime.
Slipping back is always a possibility. Temptation is always lurking. The lure of bad habits is always ominously present.
What are the steps that help to keep one on track?
*Commit to making specific changes. Write them down or memorize them.
*Stay with a chosen regimen of exercise, meditation, and forgiveness.
*Listen to your body. Allow your body to communicate in ways that will enable your discipline to remain strong.
*Watch your diet carefully, avoid offending foods which harm your system.
*Remain calm in all things. Don't allow interferences which get you off track.
* Enjoy solitude. The more you can invite into your life the better.
*Until you are ready, limit interaction with others. Interaction will test your progress.
*Maintain a daily healthy affirmation of your primary relationship(s).
*Care for your own needs with sensitivity.
*Be gentle in all things.
These are just a few steps for moving into a climate of change. There may still be overcast days, however carry an umbrella and be prepared to ward off anything raining on your day.
Slipping back is always a possibility. Temptation is always lurking. The lure of bad habits is always ominously present.
What are the steps that help to keep one on track?
*Commit to making specific changes. Write them down or memorize them.
*Stay with a chosen regimen of exercise, meditation, and forgiveness.
*Listen to your body. Allow your body to communicate in ways that will enable your discipline to remain strong.
*Watch your diet carefully, avoid offending foods which harm your system.
*Remain calm in all things. Don't allow interferences which get you off track.
* Enjoy solitude. The more you can invite into your life the better.
*Until you are ready, limit interaction with others. Interaction will test your progress.
*Maintain a daily healthy affirmation of your primary relationship(s).
*Care for your own needs with sensitivity.
*Be gentle in all things.
These are just a few steps for moving into a climate of change. There may still be overcast days, however carry an umbrella and be prepared to ward off anything raining on your day.
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Reshaping Self Image at 70
How aging slips up on you and surprises you with its illusions and tricks and blind curves. When did you get the idea that you had reached your level of comfortable maturity? Was it in your 30's, or 40's or 60's or not yet? The question might be better asked: "when did you reach your first level of comfortable maturity?" Follow that with, and how long did it last?
Maturing is a continuum. You don't ever reach it, you just keep climbing, attempting to scale its heights, hoping not to slide back, hanging on to the strength the climb requires, learning from the dangers along the way. Self image assists your strength, enables your willingness to risk, provides awareness of the need to look at life and yourself differently. What has been doesn't need to always be. The mirror may serve as an external motivation. Your heart and soul and mind will tell you when its time to reshape the internal person you are.
Man, am I ever still climbing, but much more slowly, less deliberately, without so much awareness of the stamina it takes to keep going, and lacking in remembering what I am gaining along the way.
There are so many dreaded dangers that are a part of the climb Looking down or back is probably unwise. If you are inclined to vertigo, look straight up. If you are clumsy of foot, choose your footholds carefully. If you are weak of hand, hang on for dear life. Reshaping that image will take the willingness to take chances, to risk, to breathe deeply and to decide the climb is worth it.
Self Image is much like some of the apparel we have kept in our closets too long. Those old jackets may be outmoded, moth holes may be obvious, frayed sleeves or collars may compromise its attractiveness. Sometime its just time for a make over. Some say that can't be done. Others will argue that it must be done. Most don't choose to wear the same wardrobe everyday. Choosing a different outfit is an attempt at image change. Changing hairstyle, getting a new pair of glasses may help you be seen and see differently.
My goal is to work on the change. I know lots of people who will be gratified. Others won't care. But I will be the one rewarded, because who I was and who I wish to be change as I mature.
Maturing is a continuum. You don't ever reach it, you just keep climbing, attempting to scale its heights, hoping not to slide back, hanging on to the strength the climb requires, learning from the dangers along the way. Self image assists your strength, enables your willingness to risk, provides awareness of the need to look at life and yourself differently. What has been doesn't need to always be. The mirror may serve as an external motivation. Your heart and soul and mind will tell you when its time to reshape the internal person you are.
Man, am I ever still climbing, but much more slowly, less deliberately, without so much awareness of the stamina it takes to keep going, and lacking in remembering what I am gaining along the way.
There are so many dreaded dangers that are a part of the climb Looking down or back is probably unwise. If you are inclined to vertigo, look straight up. If you are clumsy of foot, choose your footholds carefully. If you are weak of hand, hang on for dear life. Reshaping that image will take the willingness to take chances, to risk, to breathe deeply and to decide the climb is worth it.
Self Image is much like some of the apparel we have kept in our closets too long. Those old jackets may be outmoded, moth holes may be obvious, frayed sleeves or collars may compromise its attractiveness. Sometime its just time for a make over. Some say that can't be done. Others will argue that it must be done. Most don't choose to wear the same wardrobe everyday. Choosing a different outfit is an attempt at image change. Changing hairstyle, getting a new pair of glasses may help you be seen and see differently.
My goal is to work on the change. I know lots of people who will be gratified. Others won't care. But I will be the one rewarded, because who I was and who I wish to be change as I mature.
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
What Changes Would You Make?
Over the years, as opportunity has permitted, a compelling question has generated some very probing insights into the character and persona of a number of older acquaintances, not to mention myself.
The question is: "if you had your life to live over, what changes would you make?"
Replies range from "my life has been complete, I would change nothing at all;" "where do I start and how much time do I have;" "I couldn't improve on perfection;" "mostly everything;" "does that include appearance?"
Somewhere in the range of these exclamations and hundreds of others lies the practical and on target reply. My reply, over the years, to those who say "nothing" is to suggest "you must not have learned very much." Life, after all, is a classroom.
Seventy years, that proverbial three score and ten, allows for attending a lot of life classes. Almost everyday is, or may be, chock full of educational possibilities for the growing mind and the declining body.
Some days lessons are discovered through regret, inappropriate choices and behaviors, spurts of anger, motivations created by emotional maladies, stupidity, ugly dispositions, and so the list grows and goes.
But many days are days that come with the tutoring of experience and wisdom and sorting out what is a better course to take. Even slips of tongue teach us well. Learning boundaries in relationships, honoring the sensitivity required in encountering others, enlarging your own sharp insights, finding ways to escape falling into traps, listening to yourself before you speak, hearing others as they speak, smiling generously, embracing the schoolroom of the world.
The lessons are there. The book is an enormous volume, forever being written, the tools are eyes and ears and less frequently lips and tongue.
What changes would you make? What grade would you give yourself for each day? What willingness is there to engage in the discipline of changing? What bad habits are you willing to forego? What enriching wonders would you be willing to greet?
Start tomorrow or immediately after reading this. Ask, "what change am I willing to make?" Start with one, add others. Keep a list. Check on your own insight and progress. You may be pleased that the clay of your being is still pliable.
The question is: "if you had your life to live over, what changes would you make?"
Replies range from "my life has been complete, I would change nothing at all;" "where do I start and how much time do I have;" "I couldn't improve on perfection;" "mostly everything;" "does that include appearance?"
Somewhere in the range of these exclamations and hundreds of others lies the practical and on target reply. My reply, over the years, to those who say "nothing" is to suggest "you must not have learned very much." Life, after all, is a classroom.
Seventy years, that proverbial three score and ten, allows for attending a lot of life classes. Almost everyday is, or may be, chock full of educational possibilities for the growing mind and the declining body.
Some days lessons are discovered through regret, inappropriate choices and behaviors, spurts of anger, motivations created by emotional maladies, stupidity, ugly dispositions, and so the list grows and goes.
But many days are days that come with the tutoring of experience and wisdom and sorting out what is a better course to take. Even slips of tongue teach us well. Learning boundaries in relationships, honoring the sensitivity required in encountering others, enlarging your own sharp insights, finding ways to escape falling into traps, listening to yourself before you speak, hearing others as they speak, smiling generously, embracing the schoolroom of the world.
The lessons are there. The book is an enormous volume, forever being written, the tools are eyes and ears and less frequently lips and tongue.
What changes would you make? What grade would you give yourself for each day? What willingness is there to engage in the discipline of changing? What bad habits are you willing to forego? What enriching wonders would you be willing to greet?
Start tomorrow or immediately after reading this. Ask, "what change am I willing to make?" Start with one, add others. Keep a list. Check on your own insight and progress. You may be pleased that the clay of your being is still pliable.
Monday, May 4, 2009
New York is Therapy for Seniors
Well, it was a hurry up, crowd all you can into a little moe than 60 hours weekend. New York is like that. Excepting Sunday morning, its pace, at least in Manhattan, is a race to the finish. Like the Kentucky Derby, it surprises you who makes it around the track.
Despite Sunday morning detours, created by a major bicycle marathon, we were able in a little under 2 hours to make it to the airport and finally be on our way back to the terra firma of Arizona. Its crazy here, but nothing quite like the big Apple.
Filled with as many opportunites for gourmet dining, a huge, Hollywood style wedding in Central Park, a ride to the "top of the Rock" at Rockefeller Center, complete with fog and mist, but charming nonetheless, with the joke of the weekend being when one of our number sent out a spectacular photo, of one of the classic buildings of New York, identifying it as The Empire State Building, only to discover it was the Chrysler Building. It was a pack it in, save time for rest until you are back home kind of trip. It is what New York always is, enchanting, mesmerizing, intriguing and just plain exciting.
Hope your weekend was quite so good and our reunion here one in which we can share more anecdotes about surrendering oneself to the ecstatic and esoteric once in a while.
Despite Sunday morning detours, created by a major bicycle marathon, we were able in a little under 2 hours to make it to the airport and finally be on our way back to the terra firma of Arizona. Its crazy here, but nothing quite like the big Apple.
Filled with as many opportunites for gourmet dining, a huge, Hollywood style wedding in Central Park, a ride to the "top of the Rock" at Rockefeller Center, complete with fog and mist, but charming nonetheless, with the joke of the weekend being when one of our number sent out a spectacular photo, of one of the classic buildings of New York, identifying it as The Empire State Building, only to discover it was the Chrysler Building. It was a pack it in, save time for rest until you are back home kind of trip. It is what New York always is, enchanting, mesmerizing, intriguing and just plain exciting.
Hope your weekend was quite so good and our reunion here one in which we can share more anecdotes about surrendering oneself to the ecstatic and esoteric once in a while.
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