Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Birthdays and Anniversaries: Celebrate!

This month marks the occasion of some very significant dates. You won't find these dates marked in red on your calendar, no holiday falls on them, no great hoopla occurs around them. They are just dates of mostly ordinary, very conscientious and respected people.

In this case the dates are the birth of my father, now deceased, and the 72nd anniversary of my parents, marriage (my mother will be 89 in November). Dad would be 93 this year. He has been gone for 13 years. I still miss him. His absence is no reason not to celebrate his day. The way I do that is to reflect on how precious he still is to me.

The anniversary is easier to overlook. After all, the marriage ended upon his death. I don't think so. I think that marriage will remain a part of the very soul and fibre of those of us who benefited from it.

It's common to engage in congratulations and celebrations of friends and family who are still around. Why should it not be just so common for us to celebrate those whose life is past, but whose spirit is still very much alive. Why not light a candle on the day of the event. Let it burn all day to remind all in the house (even if it is only you) of this extraordinary day.

Or throw a party. Who says the guest of honor has to be present? Invite those who remember and allow a time for shared reflection.

My guess is the intentional exercise of your own memory will bring a flood of joy and maybe some tears. That's really okay. It will likely serve as a cleansing of your soul and an energizing of your spirit, not to mention the flight your heart will likely take.

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