Keep Peace in the Family, as Well as on Earth

The carols are already reminding us of the season of “peace on earth and good will to all!” This year there seems to be a little more feel and promise in that eternal prayer. Just to have the feeling is progress. We have been buried in skepticism quite long enough.

Whatever we can do to contribute to a more peaceful world of good will, I am sure we will want to. But what about our own families? What about some of the traditional tensions that seem to accompany holiday get togethers? What about the taboo topics, that one or another just feels compelled to raise? What about the embarrassments one or another seems to find humorous, but really end up hurting?

What about deciding that if you or another in the family just won’t and can’t get along that one of you chooses to stay away? What if it is just not worth the risk to get everybody under the same roof, if somebody in that number chooses to be deviously cantankerous? What if, this year, for those who prefer peace and quiet and a tranquil holiday experience just choose to do so on their own, quite apart and free from guilt?

One can always hope, perhaps even pray, but don’t be disappointed if your efforts do not produce the desired results. One can always expect that some behavioral change might have occurred over the past year. What evidence is there that that might be so? One can always gamble that the stars will be aligned just right. And, if that is not the case, then what?

Bad holidays can be prepared for just like good ones. All the trouble one goes to make for a happy occasion with all the trimmings, abundance of food and gift giving and photo taking and story telling and maybe even caroling should result, it would seem, in an enjoyable outcome. So do some thinking about how to make it so. Maybe a direct conversation with the “troublemaker” in the family would help. Maybe, they just haven’t quite caught on how they can contribute to a joyous holiday for everyone in the family.

Maybe this will be the year when change, real change in the family may happen; maybe the decorum will match the décor this year. Maybe your Christmas gift can include the prayer: “Let’s keep peace in the family as well as on earth.”